I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
