the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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