Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
