I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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