I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
