He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
