i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
