in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Ketchup is God's man juice
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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