i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize