just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
