Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
