McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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