I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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