I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
