Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
