brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Green mimosas i think yes
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Randomize