I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
