so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
