Its about making memories worth repressing
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
