No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Randomize
