Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize