if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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