you guys were way drunker than both of me
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
