I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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