There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
