You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
