If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
