Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
