sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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