the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
