his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
