Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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