your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize