She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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