Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
