Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
