If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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