that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
