Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Randomize
