He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
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