I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
