reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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