the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
