At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I love you.
Bad choice
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