I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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