It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
