Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
