First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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