So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
