It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
