? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
