I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
